Lions & Tigers & Rodents! Oh My!
by magenta13
Summary: Beckett gets an unwanted "house guest" and asks for Castle's help in getting rid of her new furry friend. Just a one-shot that actually turned out to be pretty funny!


It was 8pm on a Saturday night and Rick Castle sat in his office, mesmerized by the blinking of the cursor staring back at him. He was stuck. He had been sitting there for an hour now, completely blank. Usually when he got jammed up like this, he would just take a trip down to the precinct. There was something about the familiar feel of the bullpen, a delicious beverage from the restaurant-style cappuccino maker and a conversation with his favorite detective that relaxed him and got his creative juices flowing once more. He glanced at his watch, hoping it was still early enough to catch her at the precinct but quickly realized that Beckett had today off, unless someone was murdered that is. But since she hadn't called him with a body, he figured she was probably out with Josh.

For the first time in a long time, he allowed his mind to linger on her. He was more than aware of his feelings for her. He couldn't quite pinpoint when it happened but one day it dawned on him that he wanted her to be his, and only his, permanently. But since she was still with Doctor Motorcycle Boy, he rarely let himself indulge in this fantasy. It hurt too much when he came back to reality. But as he sat there, he let his mind wander to her. Her eyes, her hands, her soft brown curls, her hips, the way she bites her lip when she's feeling shy or thinking really _really_ hard. He was pulled out of his daydream by his ringing phone, "Bad boys, bad boys, watcha gonna do? Watcha gonna do when they come for you? Bad boys, bad boys…" Castle chuckled at the cleverly chosen ringtone for Beckett. The theme song from "COPS" was just too fitting to pass up.

"Please tell me someone's dead so I can escape the confines of this inspirationless office".

"Wow. Must be a pretty bad case of writer's block if you're hoping for the death of an innocent person and making up words like inspirationless".

"You have no idea. I've been toying with the idea of changing my name and writing children's books". He loved how quickly they fell into familiar banter.

"What like a baby tomato pushes his girlfriend down a well because she was sleeping with his best friend the carrot?"

He let out a hearty laugh before replying. "Well, you may not know this but baby tomatoes can be vengeful little bastards. So where's the body?"

"Uh… no body" she replied awkwardly.

"So you were just calling me to chat?"

"Well, no. I… well… you see…" She was stumbling over her words.

He could tell she was hesitant to tell him the real reason for the call so he continued to tease her. "Were you calling to ask me what I'm wearing?" he asked seductively.

"You know what? Just forget it" she snapped, secretly knowing that would shut him right up.

"No! Beckett, wait! I'm sorry. I wanna hear what you were gonna say".

"Uh… well… I kinda need a favor".

"I'm intrigued. What could _you_ possibly need from little old me?" he said with a feigned air of arrogance.

"Never mind if you're gonna be so smug about it" Her words were harsh but her tone was light.

"Ok, ok. I'm done. Seriously, what do you need?"

"Umm… there'samouseinmybathtub." She spat it out all at once, like she was ripping off a band-aid.

"So?"

"So," she said exasperatedly, "Josh is at work, Esposito and Lanie are on a date, Ryan is tasting wedding cakes and my Dad is out of town for the weekend. Oh and I don't know any of my neighbors because I'm a workaholic".

"Let me get this straight. Iron Fist Kate Beckett is afraid of mice? And you're calling on me to save the day. Like a superhero".

"I wouldn't put it that way, Castle…"

"How would you put it, Detective?" he said, continuing to push her buttons.

"Let's just say if you don't come over and get rid of it, I'm gonna have to shoot it. And then I'll have Alexis help me put it in your bed".

"I'll be right over" he said hurriedly, immediately fearful of her threat.

Twenty minutes later, he softly knocked on her door. She opened it with a grateful grin that she had to fight from getting too big at seeing the Superman t-shirt he was wearing. He had changed it before coming over, hoping she'd get a kick out of it.

"Nice t-shirt" she ribbed.

"Oh this old thing" he said with mocked humility.

"Thanks for coming, Castle" their conversation suddenly taking a turn for the sincere.

"Of course. I'm here for all of your extermination needs. Now, where is this mouse?"

She led him down the hall, through her bedroom and as she entered the bathroom, she casually tossed out, "so I may have under exaggerated when I said it was a mouse".

He began to chuckle but the laugh died in his throat as he peered over the edge of the tub, finding a huge, black rat.

"Jesus Christ, Beckett!" he yelled and leapt back. "That's not a rodent that's a small bear! How'd it get in there?"

"I don't know!" she exclaimed defensively. "It was there when I came back from the grocery store. I was gonna take bath. I almost turned on the water on before I even noticed it."

"And it can't get out?" He gulped nervously and took a tentative step back towards the tub.

"Apparently not".

"Maybe you _should_ shoot it" he quipped.

"I like this bathtub too much. Besides, that's why you're here, right? To 'save the day'?"

"Um, maybe you should call someone else. I don't do well with unnaturally large creatures. Need I remind you of the tarantula incident?"

"Oh come on, Castle! You're the only one who could come over. I'm desperate! I even considered calling the Captain for God's sake!"

"But… I… It's…" He was trying to come up with any conceivable excuse, but finding none, he finally blurted out, "Fine!"

A satisfied smile crept over Kate's face. He would do anything to see that smile, even battle a giant rat of death.

"I'm gonna need a trashcan, a broom and a really big plate" he commanded.

She left for a moment and returned with the items he requested. After setting them down on the floor, she began to retreat towards the door.

"Where are you going?" he asked in disbelief.

"Oh I'm not staying in here. What if it gets out of the bathtub when you're trying to catch it?" she said inching out of the room.

"You're just gonna leave me in here with this thing?"

She shut the door but he heard her muffled reply "I'll be right outside for moral support".

_The things we do for love_ he thought. _Here goes nothin'._

With the trashcan in one arm and broom in the other, he timidly approached the tub. He tossed the trashcan into it and the rat scurried halfway up the tub's steep sides and slid back down again. He yelped and jumped back startled.

"You ok in there?" he heard from outside.

"Fine. Rabies is easily treatable, right?" he asked only half joking.

He again advanced towards the beast holding the broom out in front of him, ready to fend off a surprise attack. He slowly bent down and reached out a hand to secure the plastic receptacle. He said a silent prayer then as swiftly as possible, used the broom to sweep the offensive creature into the trashcan. Once inside, he turned the can right-side-up and set it on the floor, hearing the intruder fall to the bottom. He kept the broom solidly covering the opening. Bending down carefully, he grabbed the serving platter Kate brought off of the floor and in a flurry of motion, exchanged it for the broom as the lid to his makeshift trap.

There was a copy of "Flowers for Your Grave" sitting on the floor and he was grateful that Kate's novel choice for 'tub reading' was thick and heavy enough to secure the plate as he set it atop the rat's cage. He sat down on the side of the tub to collect himself but as his eye caught a black washcloth hanging on the towel rack, he got a wicked idea. He wet the washcloth in the sink and wadded it up into a ball.

"Beckett!" he called. "It's ok. I got him. You can come in now".

He hid his hands behind his back and as soon as she apprehensively opened in the door, he tossed his fake rat straight at her.

She let out a scream and ran out the door in surprise. He couldn't suppress the bellowing laughter that escaped. Once she realized it was a prank, she reentered the room with a look that said 'I'm not amused'.

"Hysterical, Castle. I should have known it was fake. You're too much of a wuss to actually touch that rat".

"Did you just call me a 'wuss'? That's cold especially since I just got a rat out of your bathtub for you. But I understand. You're just embarrassed because you screamed like a girl".

"Whatever" was all she could counter with. She wasn't really mad at him for playing that trick on her. She actually was glad that they could joke and be comfortable around one another. She liked Josh but she just couldn't have fun with him the way she could with Castle. "So where is it?" she continued before her head could think any deeper into what this all meant.

He nodded his head toward the plate covered trash can. And she shuddered comically.

"So Kate, now what do we do with it?"

"I don't know! You're Buffy the Rat Slayer, you tell me what we should do with it" she retorted.

"Well, _I_ don't want to kill it? Do _you_?"

"No but I don't know what else to do with it. Can we take it to animal control?" she suggested.

"I don't want that thing in my car!" he squeaked. His vivid imagination was ripe with disastrous scenarios involving a loose rat in a vehicle travelling at high speeds.

"Let's at least put it out in the hall until we figure it out. I don't want that thing in my apartment anymore" she said with disgust.

He gingerly grabbed the contraption he had mentally dubbed 'rat prison' and took it out of her apartment, setting it down gently in the hall. He closed the door and felt a sigh of relief at having successfully expelled the rat. He went back into the bathroom to wash his hands and found Beckett dumping a superfluous amount of bleach into the bathtub.

She took a break from her cleaning and looked up at him. "This may seem like a weird question after the horror we've just been through, but are you hungry?"

"Oddly enough, I'm starving".

"Me too". She sounded puzzled at the fact that she hadn't lost her appetite. "Wanna order some Chinese food or something?"

"Chinese sounds great".

After ordering, they opened a bottle of wine and fell into comfortable conversation. Being Saturday night, it took awhile for their food to get there but it seemed like no time had gone by at all when they heard the knock at the door. Castle stood up to get it but she grabbed his hand and pulled him back to the couch.

"Rick, you dropped everything to come over and perform a rat exorcism for me. The least I can do is feed you" she said as she grabbed her wallet off of the kitchen table and walked over to answer the door.

She had called him Rick. As she paid for the food, he wondered what that could possibly mean. Did she finally feel comfortable enough with him to start calling him by his first name? He rarely called her Kate because the familiarity and informality seemed to make her uncomfortable. _It probably means nothing_, he thought to himself.

She was laughing when she returned and sat down.

"What's so funny?" he asked, helping her open up the cartons of food.

"The delivery guy asked what was in the trashcan. I told him he didn't want to know".

It seemed to amuse her to no end because she continued to laugh quietly to herself. In his head, Castle mused that if a chuckle and a giggle had a baby, it would be the laugh she was laughing now. He couldn't help but wish he could always be around to hear her laugh like that.

They dug in and enjoyed the food immensely despite Castle's appetite-murdering suggestion that they should've just roasted the rat on a spit instead of paying for Chinese food.

The hours passed, as did glasses of wine. Jokes were made, memories shared, and Kate couldn't remember the last time she had such a pleasant night in. The thought that if she and Castle were together that every night could be like this, began to creep into her subconscious.

Finally, as midnight came and went, Castle stood up to stretch and finally remarked on the time. "Well, it's getting pretty late. I think it's time I got out of your hair and let you get some rest".

"Yeah. I didn't realize it was so late" she said while trying to mask her disappointment at his departure.

She handed him his coat and walked him to the door. Whole opening it, she felt the need to show her gratitude once more. His breath caught in his throat as she leaned up and kissed his cheek.

"Thank you, Castle". Her voice was suddenly serious. "I don't like to have to depend on people and it's really hard for me to admit when I need help so I really appreciate you coming and not making a big deal out of it".

At first, he had to think about what she was thanking him for. It had been so long since the rat debacle, he had forgotten why he was there in the first place. "Of course. You can always call me for whatever". After the words left his mouth he wanted to smack himself for being so ineloquent. _You're a writer for God's sake! _He decided to blame it on the feel of her soft lips on his cheek.

At the remembrance of his rodent friend, he wondered what he was going to do with it. He began to voice his concern to Kate but was cut off at the gasp she let out as she looked down at the rat prison. The trashcan was toppled over, the plate was on the floor and the rat was nowhere to be seen. Their eyes scanned up and down the hallway. Then the realization hit them that the door had been open for some time now. They both glanced nervously inside the apartment, wondering if their furry friend had made his way back inside without their notice. The thought of finding that oversized rodent in her bed made Kate a little sick to her stomach and before she understood what she was saying, she blurted out "Can I sleep at your place?"

Perhaps the night was not over after all.

* * *

A/N: My story Heartbreaking Heat, while a great story (in my humble opinion), is a little intense right now. Interestingly, the show has also been uncharacteristically serious. I felt like writing something a little lighter and voila; this one-shot was born. I was really trying to get the characters and their dialogue right. This is the first story of the fluffy and comical kind that I have written and I would really appreciate everyone's input!


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